My Bucketlist [Part 1]

My terrible nocturnal-self comes back again. sigh…

It’s 2 AM in my country and I’m still wide awake. And, the worst part is I’m still with my notebook, which means, I’ll delay my sleep for some more hours. Times like this remind me so much of some months ago in 2014. The moment when I struggled to finish my paper to get my bachelor’s degree. The moment when I forced myself to stay awake and to think while all my body, eyes, and brain were wanting was sleep. I still remember the moment I even cried in the middle of the night because of being run out of ideas for developing my paper. Haha those precious times. The pains can still be felt.

However, surprise! I miss those times. I miss those times when I had to stay up to finish my assignment since it was due tomorrow morning. I miss entering classroom (as a student). I miss participating in classroom discussion with my lecturer and my classmates. I miss presenting certain topic in front of the class. I miss going to college. Haha in short, I miss studying in a classroom. I miss being a student.

I myself even felt surprised when I said this. I mean I’m still able to feel how painful it is to defeat yourself, to push the limit in yourself in finishing your study. It was just like yesterday I went through those times, and here I am, ten months later, already wanting to continue my study. I never say I feel enough just by getting a bachelor’s degree. I always want to get my Master’s degree and even Doctorate, if I’m really capable to do so. Yet, I don’t know it will come this fast, Hehe.

But then again, looking at my job now, It’s a little bit impossible for me to continue my study while I’m also working. And I’m still 1 year and a half under contract. And then again, I still hold onto my dream to continue my study abroad. So, maybe in 2016? 2017? Hopefully!!! Wish me luck! But then, my age will be ………

Nevermind, haha.


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